Middlemarch by George Eliot shows that a happy and successful marriage is based on the willingness of two characters to work together. Each character should have a wide perspective and be able to understand the feelings of the other. Eliot states in his Finale that “marriage remains the beginning the epic home – the gradual conquest or irremediable lose of that perfect union” (511). Marriage is an endeavor that is shared by two individuals with the goal of bringing them together. This slow progress is evident in Eliot’s Middlemarch when Mary Garth marries Fred Vincy. Mary insists that Fred develop into a mature individual before she will marry him. Rosamond Vincy’s marriage to Tertiuslydgate was a marriage based on hostility. Fred Vincy and Mary Garth as well as Will Ladislaw & Dorothea Brooke Casaubon have both grown and learned from their partner. George Eliot demonstrates through the couples of Middlemarch that marriage requires work as well as a constant evolution in one’s perspective and that of their partner.
Dorothea Brooke is a woman who completely loses herself to serve Edward Casaubon. Casaubon, however, does not give much thought to Dorothea’s wishes. Dorothea believes that Casaubon, with his supposed intelligence and wisdom, will be able to help her gain more education and discover the higher purpose of life. She only wants to be his assistant. She completely relies on his happiness and self-worth. Dorothea becomes exiled from her studies when Casaubon rejects her. Eliot notes that because the courtship of Dorothea with Casaubon is short, it can lead to a marriage without a solid foundation.
The nature of the person you met through courtship may be different from your preconceived notions, or it could even be worse.
The marriage of Dorothea to Casaubon was finalized by letters, instead of face-to-face communication.
Dorothea starts to question whether Casaubon is “worth living” for (265). She was driven to create better housing for farmworkers. But men have the money, power and land needed to build these homes. Casaubon refuses, because he is busy with his projects, to help Dorothea work alone, even though this would improve their happiness and solidarity. Casaubon’s studies are so important that he ignores Dorothea even on their honeymoon. He is shocked that “even though he won a beautiful and noble-hearted woman, he hadn’t won delight” (55-55).
Dorothea has claimed in a conversation with Casaubon that he speaks to her like “I’m something you have to deal with” (178). Casaubon’s response is ignorance. He claims to have “neither the time nor the energy for such a debate” (178). Casaubon refers to a “debate”, in which he is listening to Dorothea. He does not put in any effort to gain an understanding of Dorothea.
Rosamond, like Casaubon, views Lydgate as a thing to be acquired. Rosamond “was tired of faces and figures she had always been used to-the various irregular profiles and gaits…distinguishing those Middlemarch young men whom she had known as boys” (62). Lydgate’s a new thing to her. She wants him. Rosamond is a plant to Lydgate, who believes that by marrying Rosamond, he can give her the transplantation she needs (218). Their unwillingness to learn about each other or see each other as more than objects predicts the ultimate treatment they will give to one another.
Lydgate’s marriage with Rosamond will never be happy because of their poor courtship, and they both decided not to communicate. Rosamond’s husband never shows her respect. She tells Dorothea: “Tertius would be angry and impatient, if i said anything.” (490). She loses her happiness because she can’t express herself without getting insulted. Rosamond’s and Lydgate’s failure to resolve their financial woes causes a rift within their marriage. Rosamond is described as “a basil” by Lydgate shortly before his death. Rosamond “flourished on the brains (of a murderer)” (513). Rosamond has clearly been a barrier to Lydgate’s intellectual growth.
As opposed to Lydgate’s and Rosamond’s marriage, Dorothea Ladislaw’s marriage began with a well-developed, long courtship. This courtship has been characterized by many trials. Dorothea and Ladislaw meet for the first time while he paints. She says paintings are “like a Greek word…which I don’t understand” (51). Ladislaw “took the words of hers as a hidden judgment, and was convinced that she found Ladislaw’s sketch disgusting” (51).
Dorothea grew as a person before Ladislaw proposed to her. This was a key factor in their marriage’s success. Dorothea does charity to make herself feel better, more so than to help others. She later realizes that there is a life outside her own. She becomes a supporter anonymous of the New Hospital. Dorothea is overcome with sadness after seeing Ladislaw, Rosamond and their relationship. She forced herself to relive that scene from yesterday’s morning. She asks: “Was it just her scene? Was this her only event? She made herself think that the event was not just hers. She is able to rise above the idea that her life was all about her. Dorothea can now accept Ladislaw’s motives, and that he has connections outside their relationship.
Dorothea Ladislaw’s marriage thrives because they work together to build their relationship. Both have accepted themselves before marriage. Ladislaw accepts Dorothea as she is and allows her to pursue her own interests. Both are willing to sacrifice their status and wealth to live in a London home. It is clear that the love between them is unquestionable. Dorothea is willing to give up her money and respectability in the public eye. Will Ladislaw publically declares his affection for her. He states that “nothing else exists on her side.” I would rather hold her dead hand, than another woman’s alive” (480). Ladislaw’s love is confirmed by his decision to leave his hometown in order for Dorothea to be happy.
Eliot shows that the Bulstrodes can also empathize. Bulstrode discovers at the town meeting that others do not hold him in high regard. Eliot wrote, “All the eyes were on Mr. Bulstrode who, ever since his name was first mentioned, had experienced a crisis that felt almost too violent to sustain his fragile frame” (449). Bulstrode’s woman isn’t warned about the negative views of her spouse in the community. She learns about it from Mrs. Hackbutt (463) after talking to her. Mrs. Bulstrode stands by her husband despite the scandals that have tarnished his reputation. She is kind enough to say, “Look Up, Nicholas”, at the lowest of moments. They are able overcome the setback in their marriage because of their mutual understanding and knowledge.
The marriage of Fred Vincy with Mary Garth is described as “a solid mutual bliss” (511). The Casaubon and Lydgate marriages were unhappy. Fred and Mary know each other very well due to their lifetime courtship. Mary uses self-examination to determine what Fred and her are compatible with. She recognizes that she is not suited to be a teacher. Mary refuses to get married until Fred selects a suitable occupation. Mary refuses to marry Fred until he chooses a career that is suitable for him.
Mary doesn’t ridicule Fred, despite the fact that most people in Middlemarch think he is a blunder. Mary blames external factors instead of pointing out his faults. If Fred purchased a bad pony, this was not Fred’s fault, but the fault with the horse (511). Mary can love Fred without blaming Fred for Rosamond’s faults, like Lydgate. Fred also gets to feel love, instead of being shamed. Fred feels proud of himself for his respect of Mary. He declares to his father that he can be as gentlemanly in the work he has undertaken as if he had been a priest. Fred Vincy and Mary Garth are able to accept and love each other because they know themselves.
George Eliot is aware of the importance of external forces in determining internal happiness. In the finale of Middlemarch Eliot admits, “There is no creature with an inward strength so great that it cannot be greatly influenced by what is around it” (514). It is important to acknowledge your partner and work together in order to have a happy marriage. Eliot reveals that some couples, like Dorothea Ladislaw with Fred Vincy and Mary Garth with Will Ladislaw realize the importance of pursuing each other’s goals. The novel’s other couples suffer from selfishness, as do Dorothea, Casaubon, and Rosamond.
